Minata
by Phantom64
Summary: Hinata secretly took her father's sword and his place in the army to stop the invading Huntsclan and bring honor to her family! Formerly Nolimit5's parody but now under new management. Ch. 4 Dojo Dillemma is up!
1. Cast List

Phantom64: Now before you all scream "Plagarism!" and "This is NL's parody!" Let me explain. If you've read NL's notice about Minata, you know he's canceled it and given it to me. Why? He was sick of everyone asking him to update it when he wanted to update his other stories, and the fact he hates most anime. But since I suggested this parody and the cast to him I'm gonna continue it with the same cast and use the chapters Nolimit already posted. Lazy? Yes, but I don't own Mulan on DVD or VHS and all Youtube has is the songs. using NL's chapters just means I have one less song number to worry about. XD I may not be as experienced with parodies as Nolimit is but I can assure you I'll do my best to make this a great parody!

Mulan: Hinata from _Naruto_

Mushu: Dojo from _Xiaolin Showdown_

Captain Li Shang: Naruto from _Naruto_

Shan Yu: Huntsman from _American Dragon: Jake Long_

Yao AKA the tough soldier: Phantom64 (Me!)

Ling AKA the joking soldier: Nolimit5 a fanfic author friend and former author of this parody.

Chein-Po AKA the peaceful soldier: Wormtail96, another of my fanfic author friends

Chi-Fu AKA the annoying scribe: Squidward Tentacles from _SpongeBob SquarePants_

Fa Zhou AKA Mulan's dad: Iroh from _Avatar: The Last Airbender_

Grandma: Gran Gran AKA Katara's Grandmother from _Avatar: The Last Airbender_

The Emperor of China: Dashi from _Xiaolin Showdown_

First Ancestor: Gramps from _American Dragon: Jake Long_

Fa Li AKA Mulan's mother: Ursa from _Avatar: The Last Airbender_

General Li AKA Shang's father: Fourth Hokage from _Naruto_

Cri-Kee: Navi from _The Legend of Zelda _series

Little Brother AKA the dog: Stitch from _Lilo & Stitch_

Phantom64: That's it for now. I'll have the first two chapters up, rent Mulan,(Of find a screenplay if I'm lucky) then get to work on ch. 3! Wish me luck!


	2. Chapter 1: The Huntsclan Invasion

Phantom64: Okay remember what I said about pasting NL's first two chapters? Ignore that! These two chapters are going to be of my own design. So please read them! I don't want to be a replacement NL for you.

Chapter 1: The Huntsclan Invasion

It was a regular night at the wall that served as the northern border of Toonia. The sky was filled with stars and the great wall was silent other than the footsteps of guards. Koby was pacing up and down on watch. He was a teenager with short pink hair, goggles, and wearing white pants and a white jacket that had the word 'Marine' on the back. A Ying-Yang bird then smacked him in the back of the head as it flew by him. It perched on a watch tower nearby. Koby raised an eyebrow, wondering what's going on. "Stupid bird." He muttered. It started to caw loudly. Then, a grappling hook zoomed into the sky from the ground below and hooked itself on the wall. "What the-" Suddenly, even more grappling hooks appeared on the wall.

"We're under attack! Light the signal!" Koby screamed, running towards the nearest station on the wall. Three huntsmembers burst out of a door. They were all in red ninja-like outfits with red ski-masks on hiding their faces. They were armed with some sort of laser equipment. One held a ball and chain made of green energy, and the other two had beam swords. He screamed and quickly ran up a ladder to the nearest fire signal. He quickly grabbed a torch, but when he was about to light the signal with it, he saw someone. Standing at the end of the guard post was a frightening figure that sent utter chill's through Koby's bones. He was a big man of incredible build, his chest puffing out with muscle, and wore a red suit with a black cape. And on his head was a black ski-mask that only showed his dark, piercing eyes. And over the mask was a real dragon's skull that he used as helmet.. In his hand was a long beautifully crafted staff that seemed like a blend of science and magic. The Ying-Yang bird perched on his shoulder. There was only one person in the world known for wearing a dragon's skull.

"The Huntsman!" Koby gasped. He gulped nervously, trying to avoid his evil gaze. He then bravely lit the flame with his torch. Then, more soldiers across the wall started to light flames. "Now all of Toonia knows you're here!" Koby said bravely.

The Huntsman didn't answer. He simply chuckled, causing Koby's knees to shake. "Good. Good. I've been looking for a real challenge." He said cruelly. "Let's see how better your country fairs now that it has time to prepare. … Now then, I think your purpose is done boy." He aimed his staff like one would aim a rifle at the pink haired watchman. Koby screamed as a blast of green energy fired from the staff and hit him in the chest, sending him to plummet to the ground on the other side of the wall. As more of his Huntsarmy climbed the wall One who was much different from the red ninja clad soldiers climbed the wall without a grappling hook. He was a cyborg with very flexible limbs, white paint on his body, a white cape with red on the inside, on his mechanical mask has several war like marks on them. His piercing yellow organic eyes gave him an almost monstrous appeal. He was Grievious, the Huntsman's Lieutenant. He climbed the wall, sticking his clawed hands and feet into the wall's conctete, taking out a small chunk of it as he climbed. When he made it to the top he flipped and landed perfectly beside the Huntsman. "Commander." Grievious said a he knelt on one knee. "All of our forces are almost over the wall. But do you think it was wise to let them light the flames. They'll know we are coming."

"Like I told that young boy who I sent off the wall, this just makes it more of a challenge. It's been a long time since a country's put up a real fight against us." The huntsman explained. he grabbed a flag nearby with Toonia's symbol on it. He held it over the flame and set it ablaze. "But in the end, all fall to the flame of war…" Huntsman smirked "And it's the strong who survive, and the weak perish in the flames."

- - - -- - - - - - -

A ninja who looked in his twenties with spiky blonde hair, blue eyes, and wearing armor marched with two other ninja into Grandmaster Dashi's throne room and bowed. He was the 4rth Hokage, the general of Toonia's army. . "Your Majesty, the Huntsclan have crossed the Northern Border," Fourth informed Dashi. There were several gasps form those in the room. Dashi, the Emperor of Toonia, remained silent but his eyes could not hide the fear inside him. He was a tall old man. He was bald with blue eyes a thing mustache, and wore blue and white robes.

An anthropomorphic squid (despite the fact that he only has six tentacles) named Squidward who is bald and wearing black robes, was surprised. "Impossible! No one can get through the great wall!" Dashi raised his hand to silence him.

The Fourth looked at the Emperor gravely, "The Huntsman is leading them. We will set up defenses around your palace immediately."

Dashi strictly replied, "NO!" He stood up and walked over to the ninja general. "Send your squadrons to protect my people. Squidward."

Squidward stood up, feeling important, "Yes, your Highness?"

"Deliver conscription notices throughout all the provinces. Call up reserves, and as many new recruits as possible," Dashi ordered.

"Forgive me, your majesty, but I believe my squadrons can stop him," Fourth said hesitatingly.

"I won't take any chances, Hokage. A single grain of rice can tip the scale; one man may be the difference between victory and defeat," Dashi said wisely.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Phantom64: Okay chapter 1 is done! I'll have the next one up soon! R &R!


	3. Chapter 2: Honor to us All

Phantom64: Okay here's chapter 2. And guess what? I found Mulan on DVD! Whoo! This means I won't make any mistakes D enjoy! We finally meet Hinata, who's my favorite female character in Naruto!

Chapter 2: Honor to us All

Meanwhile, on a farm far from the Imperial city, there lived a 15-year old girl. She had long purple hair that came down to her shoulders, And her pupils were as white, making it seem she was blind, but she could see very well.. She was wearing a nightgown. Her name is Hinata. She was sitting on her bed going over some things.

"Quiet and demure…graceful, polite, delicate, refined, poised…" Hinata recited to herself as she picked up a paintbrush and wrote what she was reciting on her right wrist. "…punctual!"

Hinata's head jerked at the sound of a Rooster's Crow. "Oh no!" Hinata gasped, quickly jumping off her bed. "Stitch! Stitch!" she called, blowing on her wrist, hoping to quickly dry the ink. "Sti…" She glances down at a sleeping "dog" on the floor. It looked like a dark-blue koala with big, long ears and he had big, black eyes, razor sharp teeth and blue patterns on his body. He had two antennas coming out of the top of his head, two more arms coming out from below his two original arms, and three spikes coming out of his back.

"Ah! There you are!" Stitch gave a big yawn and rubbed his eyes. "Who's the smartest doggy in the world?" Hinata cooed, scratching Stitch behind the ear. "C'mon, smart boy! Can you help me with my chores today?"

"Eh, why not?" Stitch shrugged dully.

She smiled and then tied a sack of chicken feed to his back, complete with a pole and a can of soda attached. "CAFFINE!!!" Stitch screamed and immediately started chasing the soda can, running promptly into a wall next to the door.. "Ow…" Stitch rubbed his head, but then ran out the door, scattering grain everywhere. Chickens followed him and happily ate their breakfast.

Meanwhile, an elderly old man named Iroh was inside a temple with many tablets of his past family. He was a tubby man with white hair tied in a bun. He set a lit stick and set it on upon a hanging pan that had a small dragon statue on it. He kneeled before the tablets and held his hands together and prayed.

"Honorable ancestors…please help Hinata impress the matchmaker today." Just then, Stitch burst into the family temple, spreading grain and was followed by a herd of chickens and they happily munched on the grain. Taking it as a bad sign, he added, "Please. PLEASE help her!"

As Iroh limped out of the temple on a cane, Hinata came rushing over with a tray of tea. Stitch was nearby, finally stopped and was just trying to reach the soda can. She lowered it to him and he laughed happily, "Dr. Pepper!"

"Father, I brought you some…" Not seeing where she was going, she accidentally bumped into Iroh, dropping the china. Luckily, he catches the teapot on his cane while the cups hit the ground and shatter.

"Hinata…" Iroh sighed.

"I brought a spare!" Hinata smiled cheerfully, pulling out another cup from behind her.

"Hinata…"

"Remember, the doctor said three cups of tea in the morning…" Hinata said, pouring the tea into the little cup.

"Hinata."

"…and three at night," she continued.

"Hinata!" Iroh interrupted. "You should already be in town. We're counting on you to…"

"Uphold the family honor," Hinata cut him off, sighing. "Don't worry, Father. I won't let you down." Giving him a kiss on the cheek, she took off. "Wish me luck!"

"Hurry!" Iroh called out to her. He looked down to Stitch, who looked up to him, Head shaking from the sudden caffeine rush.. "I'm going to…pray some more," Iroh sighed as he turned back to the temple.

"Caffine good!" Stitch crackled as he chased after the chickens in a mad caffeine rush of energy.

Later…

Meanwhile, in town, a woman named Ursa was waiting. As she waited several people sped in thestreet either on horseback or pulling a wooden cart. "Ursa, where is your daughter?" a woman ninja named Kurenai walked out of a building. "Matchmaker Aunt Wu is not a patient woman!"

"Of all the days to be late," Ursa sighed. "I should have prayed to the ancestors for luck."

"How lucky can they be?" an old woman named Kanna said, the grandmother of Hinata and mother of Ursa. Affectionately called Gran Gran. "They're dead. Besides, I've got all the luck we'll need!" Kanna held up a wicker cage with a little glowing fairy inside it. It was basically a glowing yellow ball with wings. "This is your chance to prove yourself, Navi," Kanna whispered kindly to the fairy, named Navi. Kanna covered her eyes as she stepped off the sidewalk and began walking across a busy road.

"Gran Gran! No!" Ursa gasped.

Kanna didn't listen. She continued walking across the street. Many people in their carts saw her and quickly pulled away, but caused major destruction and collateral damage. Kanna made it across the street to the other sidewalk. She emerges completely unscathed! Although the street was littered with broken carts and injured people. "Crazy old hag!" One screamed.

"Yup! This fairy's a lucky one!" Kanna declared happily.

Navi, on the other hand, looked ready to puke from absolute horror. "Yipe…" she whimpered before passing out on the bottom of her cage. Ursa just sighed. Just then, Hinata came riding in on a chestnut horse that belonged to her family, named Epona. Hinata hopped off and struck an introductory pose.

"I'm here!" Hinata sees that Ursa was giving her a disappointing look, because Hinata was still in her nightgown and had straw all over it and her hair. "What? I had to-"

"None of your excuses," Ursa interrupted, pushing Hinata inside a building. "Now, let's get you cleaned up." Kurenai and another ninja woman named Tsunade and her assistant, Shizune appeared.

"There you are!" Kurenai said. She stared at Hinata's white eyes. "What's with her eyes? Is she blind or something?"

"Uh, no. She can see just fine. It's a genetic thing." Ursa explained.

(Begin the song Honor To Us All!)

Kurenai: This **is what you give me to work with?**

The three inspected Hinata.

**Well, honey, I've seen worse**

**We're going to turn this sow's ear**

**Into a silk purse. **

They stripped Hinata of all her clothes behind a thin dressing wall( Don't get any ideas, perverts P) and pushed her into a tub of bathwater.

"It's freezing!" Hinata shivered.

"It would've been warm, if you were here on time," Ursa said. Kurenai then began to shampoo Hinata's hair.

**We'll have you, washed and dried**

**Primped and polished till you glow with pride**

**Just my recipe for instant bride**

**You'll bring honor to us all.**

Ursa was going to wash Hinata's arm until she saw her notes. "Hinata, what's this?" Ursa asked, exasperated.

"Uh…notes. In case, I forgot something," Hinata answered nervously. Kanna then came over and gave Ursa Navi's cage.

"Hold this. We're going to need more luck than I thought!" Kanna said, walking off. Tsunade took Hinata out of the tub and dressed her in a slip, then started to comb her hair.

Tsunade: **Wait and see, when we're through**

Shizune: **Boys will gladly go to war for you**

Tsunade put Hinata's hair in a bun with a red ribbon.

Tsunade: **With good fortune**

Shizune: **And a great hairdo**

Both: **You'll bring honor to us all.**

Hinata, Ursa, Kanna, Kurenai, Tsunade and Shizune started walking across the town. Hinata spotted a two boys named Shikamaru and Choji playing a game of chess. Choji was completely stumped.

**A girl can bring her family**

**Great honor in one way**

While neither was looking, Hinata placed Choji's queen at a spot making a checkmate. Both looked at the board and their jaws dropped in disbelief. Shikamaru just groaned, "What a drag…"

**By striking a good match**

**And this might be the day**

As they walked to another building Hinata noticed a trio of teenagers being tossed out of a bar. The first one to land in the dirt was a blond haired teenager wearing a rather silly blue jumpsuit, the next to be thrown on top of him was a black haired teenager with a black leather jacket and a mask covering his eyes, then the one that fell on top of them was a freaky looking cyborg with a worm-like tail. "Come back when you have money chumps!" The bar owner, Pete yelled.

" Grrr.. What do you have to do to get respect around here? Join the army?" The blonde haired teen grumbled.

In another building, Kurenai dressed Hinata in a pink kimono with a red sash.

Kurenai: **Men want girls with good taste**

**Calm **

Ursa: **Obedient**

Tsunade: **Who work fast-paced**

Ursa: **With good breeding**

Shizune: **And a tiny waist**

All: **You'll bring honor to us all!**

The girls began walking into the town again and Hinata spotted a little Hawaiian girl named Lilo playing with stuffed doll.

**We all must serve our Emperor**

A little boy named Mac came and started to annoy Lilo.

**He guards us from the Clan**

Mac then stole Lilo's doll and she started to chase him around.

**A man by bearing arms**

Hinata swiped the doll out of Mac's arms gave it back to Lilo, who smiled appreciatively.

**A girl by bearing sons**

Kurenai was putting the finishing touches on Hinata, by putting on make-up.

Kurenai: **When we're through,**

**You can't fail**

**Like a lotus blossom, soft and pale**

**How could any fellow say, "No sale?"**

**You'll bring honor to us all!**

Ursa finally added a lotus blossom clip to Hinata's hair. "There, now you're ready," Ursa smiled.

"Not yet!" Kanna shouted. "An apple for serenity!" She put an apple in Hinata's mouth. "A pendent for balance," she added, putting a pendant into Hinata's sash.

Kanna: **Beads of jade for beauty**

She placed a necklace of jade around Hinata's neck.

**You must proudly show it**

**Now, add a fairy, just for luck**

Kanna then attached Navi's cage to Hinata's sash.

**So even YOU can't blow it!**

Hinata walked out and began singing quietly to herself…

Hinata: **Ancestors, hear my plea,**

**Please don't let me make a fool of me**

**And to not uproot my family tree**

**Keep my father standing tall.**

"Hinata, wait!" Ursa called as she ran up to Hinata and gave her a parasol. Hinata then quickly ran up to the other girls that are also meeting Aunt Wu.

Starfire, Ami, Kairi & Olette: **Scarier than the undertaker**

**We are meeting our matchmaker**

Townspeople: **Destiny, guard our girls**

**And our future as it fast unfurls**

**Please look kindly on these cultured pearls**

**Each a perfect porcelain doll**

Starfire: **Please bring honor to us**

Ami: **Please bring honor to us**

Kairi: **Please bring honor to us**

Olette: **Please bring honor to us**

Hinata sent a funny look to the other girls.

Everyone: **Please bring honor to us all!**

The girls opened their parasols, bowing down at a building in front of them. Suddenly the door burst opened as an old Asian woman came out, a sullen, cynical look on her face. It was Aunt Wu , the matchmaker. Aunt Wu put on a tiny pair of glasses as she held up a clipboard. "Hinata Hyuga?"

"Present!" Hinata smiled, holding her hand up.

"Speaking without permission…" Aunt Wu made a note on her clipboard, turning her back on Hinata.

"Oops," Hinata groaned dismally, placing her hand over her eyes as she followed Aunt Wu inside the building.

"Who spit in her tea?" Kanna rolled her eyes, talking to Ursa.

Meanwhile inside, Aunt Wu started to inspect Hinata. "Hmm…too skinny. Not good for bearing sons," Aunt Wu muttered to herself.

Navi, meanwhile, managed to get herself free from her cage and whooped, "I'm free!" Hinata gasped as she frantically tries to put Navi back in the cage. When Aunt Wu turned to her, Hinata quickly snatched Navi and stuff her in her own mouth.

"Recite the Final Admonition," Aunt Wu ordered.

"Mmm-hmm-hmm," Hinata nodded, mouth-full of fairy. She pulls out a paper fan, hides her face behind it, and quickly spits Navi away. "Fulfill your duties, calmly and…" Hinata didn't know the next part. She glances down at the notes written on her arm, which were smeared from her bath! "Um…reflect before you…uh…snack." Aunt Wu raised an eyebrow. "Act!" Hinata quickly corrected and finished, "This shall bring you honor and glory." Hinata sighed, but then the matchmaker grabs the fan and searches it for cheat notes.

"Hmm, I would've sworn you were cheating," Aunt Wu said as she grabs Hinata by the arm (where the notes are!) and pulls her toward a table.

"Now, pour the tea," Aunt Wu said as the two sat down at a table and Hinata complied. "To please your future in-laws, you must demonstrate a sense of dignity…" Aunt Wu rubs her hand over her mouth while saying this, and out comes a black mustache! The ink was still wet and got on Aunt Wu's hand! Hinata cringed at this. "You must also be poised," Aunt Wu continued, unaware of what happened. Hinata, staring at Aunt Wu, tried to pour some tea, but misses the cup complete. When she got aware of this, Hinata quickly regained her composure and quickly fills the teacup.

Hinata looked down into the cup and saw Navi relaxing in the tea like a hot-tub. "Ah…this is the life…" Navi sighed happily. Hinata gasped as Aunt Wu picked up the teacup.

"Um…pardon me," Hinata muttered timidly.

"A bride must also be silent!" Aunt Wu snapped, about to drink the tea with a side-order of Hyrulian fairy.

"Could I just take that back? One moment…" Hinata grabbed the cup.

"No, now let go!" Aunt Wu snapped as she and Hinata went into a tug-of-war over the cup. Aunt Wu won, but then accidentally fell over backwards, the tea spilling all over Aunt Wu. Scared, Navi accidentally flew down her dress. "Why, you clumsy…Oh! Ah! Woo!" Aunt Wu felt the tiny fairy flying around her dress, causing her to trip over a fire-pot, spilling the coals and falling on them. "OWW!" she screamed. Hinata pulling out her fan and began desperately fanning Aunt Wu's butt, causing it to bursts into flames! "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRR!!!" the matchmaker started running around, screaming.

Meanwhile outside…"Sounds like things are going well," Kanna smiled, hearing the chaos going around.

"Put it out! Put it out! PUT IT OUT!" Aunt Wu screamed as she burst out the building, shocking everyone outside. Hinata then ran out and throws tea over Aunt Wu, killing the flames. Hinata smiled nervously, handing the teapot back to Aunt Wu, who had a near-dull look on her face, but you could tell that she was ticked…Embarrassed, Hinata quickly walks toward her mother and grandmother. Navi flew out of the building as well, into her cage and snapping it shut.

"I'm never coming out again…" Navi sighed dismally, leaning on the back of the cage.

Furious, Aunt Wu stormed over to them, smashing the teapot on the ground. "YOU! You are a DISGRACE! You may look like a bride, but you will NEVER bring your family honor!" Aunt Wu screamed, walking away. People around the area, start to walk away, whispering.

Hinata hung her head, totally devastated and heartbroken.

- - - - - - - - - - - - -

Pantom64: Poor Hinata.

Kat (my oc): You know seeing this, some things in China's culture really, really sucked.

Be sure to Review!


	4. chapter 3: Reflection

Phantom64: I've been busy with work and school. I'm sorry I haven't updated in forever! Well now I'm back! Enjoy!

Chapter 3: Reflections

Hinata sorrowfully walked through the gates of the Hygua estate, leading Epona by her reigns. Iroh stood by the door of the house and smiled, seeing his daughter return. Hinata saw him and covered her face in shame, leading Epona into her gated stall. The old firebender's smile dropped, already guessing what had happened. She tied Eopna to a pillar by the water trough, and the horse began to sip at the cool liquid. Hinata looked at her reflection in the mirror, looking away from it.

Hinata: **Look at me, I will never pass for a perfect bride.**

Hinata walked away from the stall, taking off her earrings and beads of jade.

**Or a perfect daughter. **

Hinata looked and saw that Ursa was talking with her father Iroh. Both of their heads bowed down in shame. She obviously told him about the matchmaker.

**Can it be, I'm not meant to play this part? **

Hinata kneeled down by a bush and let Navi out of her cage. The fairy floated by the bush and looked at Hinata. She walked toward a bridge, Navi looking with sadness and guilt.

"Poor girl, and I played a part in this." Navi sighed sadly.

**Now I see, that if I were to truly be myself, **

Hinata began to hop along the bridge's railing effortlessly, landing on the other side without stumbling.

**it would break my family's heart. **

Hinata walked by a pond, where a great stone dragon statue was adorned by it. She looks down at her reflection in the pond.

**Who is this girl I see, staring back at me?**

Mulan sadly leaned on the Stone Dragon and looked toward the temple

**Why is my reflection someone I don't know?**

Hinata walked up the steps leading to the temple, not noticing Navi following her. She entered the circular temple, looking at the shining stone tablets that had the names of past Hyguas on them.

**Somehow I cannot hide who I am, though I've tried.**

She looked at the many reflections of herself in the reflective tablets around her and kneeled and prayed to her ancestors.

**When will my reflection show who I am inside? **

Hinata looked at her reflection in the tablet, wiping off all of her makeup. She then untied her hair, letting it fall to her shoulders.

**When will my reflection show, who I am inside?**

Hinata got up and walked out of the temple, her hand trailing on the smooth surface of the tablets.

- - - - - - - - - - -- -

Hinata sat on a bench by a blossom tree. Her concentration was broke by Iroh clearing his throat. Hinata saw him approaching and turned her head away. Iroh walked up on his cane and sat next to her. "My my. What beautiful blossoms we have this year." He commented, looking up at the colorful tree. "But look, one's late." He noticed one unopened bud. "But, I bet when it blooms, it will be the most beautiful of all." Hinata looked up at her father and smiled. He smiled and hugged her as drums began to bang in the distance.

"What is it?" Hinata asked. Iroh stood up and walked toward the gates of their house with Hinata behind him.

"Hinata, stay inside." Ursa said. Gran Gran cleared her throat and pointed to a railing near the wall. She climbed it and kneeled on the wall's shingling. Below her was Squidward riding on a horse with a pair of ninja's riding behind him. Citizen's flocked toward them, wondering what news they had brought.

"Citizens! I bring you a proclamation from the Imperial City!" Squidward declared dramatically. "The Huntsclan have invaded Toonia!" There were several gasps and screams from the townspeople, some even fainted. "By order of the Emperor, one man from every family must serve in the Imperial Army. "The Nara family." Shikamaru walked up and took a conscription scroll from the scribe and bowed.

"Man, what a drag." He muttered.

"The Finster family."

Chucky Finster(the older one) held his aged father. "I will serve The emperor in my father's place." He said, grabbing the scroll.

"The Hygua family."

"No." Hinata gasped. Iroh gave his cane to Ursa and bravely walked toward Squidward.

"I am proud to serve my Emperor." He bowed. He then reached for the conscription notice.

"Father you can't go!" Hinata said, running out and grabbing his arm.

"Hinata!" Iroh hissed.

Hinata looked up at Squidward. "Please sir! My Father has already fought bravely in the previous war-"

"Silence!" Squidward seethed. You would do well to teach your daughter to hold her tongue in a man's presence!"

"Hinata, you dishonor me." Iroh whispered. Ursa guided Mulan back into the house.

"Report tomorrow at Camp Alpha." Squidward said, handing the scroll to Iroh.

"Yes sir." He said. The firebender turned around and walked back to his house, refusing his cane from Ursa. Hinata and Ursa looked with worry while Squidward continued to go down the names of those drafted.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Later that night Hinata secretly watched her father in his armory. He opened his closet to find his red and black fire-nation armor. He had gained a considerable amount of weight since the war ten years ago, but with a refitting tomorrow he' be in good shape. He picked up his sword and unsheathed it, He began to practice with it, cutting the air with graceful moves. He then took a one legged stance. His bad leg began to act up and he fell to the floor in pain. He then coughed for several minutes. Hinata looked in horror. If her father were to go he would surly die.

The family was now together around the dinner table, eating in silence. Thunder could be heard outside. Hinata began to pour tea for her family but angrily slammed the tea cup down and stood up. "You shouldn't have to go!"

"Hinata!" Ursa scolded.

"There are plenty of young men to fight for Toonia." She pleaded.

"It is an honor to protect my country and my family." Iroh said calmly.

"So you'll die for honor?!?" Hinata demanded.

"I will DIE doing what's right!" Iroh remarked angrily, standing up.

"But if you go-" Hinata was cut off by her father.

"I know my place, it is time you learn yours." Iroh said gravely. Hinata looked at Iroh, tears streaming down her eyes. She ran out into the rain and began to sob. Hinata leaned against the Stone Dragon in the rain. She saw her parents in their bedroom going to sleep. She looked up at the family temple and ran to it. She lit the incense and prayed to her ancestors. She got up and ran toward her home. Navi noticed her and flew ro follow the white-eyed girl.

"Now what's she up to?" the fairy wondered.

Hinata quietly entered her parent's room. Both of them were asleep. She grabbed the conscription notice and replaced it with her hair comb that her mother gave her. She took one last loving and sorrowful look at her parents and rushed out. Hinata now was in the armory. She grabbed her father's sword and unsheathed it. She looked at herself in the sword's reflection and with one swift slice she cut her lavender hair. It was now short with one large bang on each side. She then put on her father's armor and tightened it. She put the sword in it's scabbard and ran out.

Epona reared back in fright at the mysterious person in front of her. "It's okay girl, It's me." Hinata soothed. Epona calmed down and nuzzled her. She led her out of the stall and mounted her. She took one last sorrowful look at her home and rode into the night, Navi watching from afar.

"Oh boy…" Navi sighed. Inside the temple one of the statue's eyes began to glow. Gran Gran woke up with a gasp.

- - - - - - - - -

Gran Gran burst into Iroh and Ursa's room, awakening them. "Hinata is gone!" She exclaimed.

"What?!? It can't be!" Iroh looked to see his conscription notice was gone, replaced by her comb. Iroh ran to his armory to find his sword and armor gone, and lavender hairon the floor. "HINATA!" Iroh screamed, running outside. He fell, holding his bad leg in pain.

"You have to go after her!" Ursa exclaimed, running to him. "She could be killed!"

Iroh embraced his wife sorrowfully. "If we reveal her, … she will be."

- - - - - - - -- - - - - -

Naruto: Man, it's one thing after another.

Phantom64: Don't worry, next chapter we meet Dojo! And me, NL, and Wormtail will finally appear! Yeah baby! I'm back!


	5. Chapter 4: Dojo Dillemma

Phantom64: FINALLY! You better like this because my hands hurt…… Here's hoping my muse is back for good.

Chapter 4: Dojo Dillemma

Iroh did his best to calm Ursa, but even he was fighting back tears. They're only daughter, running off to war. She'd either die in battle, or die if she's discovered to be a woman. Gran Gran held up her prayer beads, looking at the temple on the hill. "Ancestors….hear our prayer. Watch over Hinata." Up in the temple of the ancestors, a peculiar wind began to blow, the leaves swirled around and around until they fell to the floor, now floating in mid-air was a ghostly short old man of Chinese descent wearing blue robes and had a long, white beard. He was Luon Lao Shi, or Gramps. He was the greatest of the ancestors.

"Dojo." He said solemnly to the small dragon statue that held the incense. "Awaken." The statue began to shake and become enveloped in energy as it fell to the ground with smoke all around it.

"I LIVE!" A small green dragon with red hair, spikes, and a Brooklyn accent screamed. He rose up from the smoke Frankenstein style. "Dojo is in the house! So tell me what mortal needs my protection Great Ancestor. You just say the word and I'm There!

"Dojo…" Gramps said, trying to get his attention.

"And let me say, if anyone foolish enough tries to hurt our family, vengeance will be MINE!" Dojo declared, bearing his teeth and growling.

"Dojo….." Luon Lao shi said again, agitated this time.

"I'll be like POW! BAM! Nobody messes with the Hyuga family guardians!-"

"DOJO!" Gramps yelled, the dragon flinching and looking at the old ghost. "THESE are the family guardians." He calmly motioned to the circle of stone statues sitting on small pedestals near the ceiling. "They…."

"Protect the family." Dojo muttered dejectedly.

Gramps looked up at the one pedestal without a statue and pointed to Dojo. "And you, oh demoted one… "

"Ring the gong." The little dragon muttered, holding up a gong and a stick.

"That's right. Now wake up the ancestors." Gramps ordered.

"You got it, one undead family reunion coming right up." Dojo sighed as he banged the gong, slithering around the temple. "Rise and shine people! Come on! Let's go! You fellas are WAY past the beauty sleep thing trust me!" As he was banging the gong, several ghosts of Hinata's ancestors began to appear. There was Avatar Roku, Madam Foster, Bumi the Earth Bender, Eustace and Murial, Hizashi Hyuga, Samuel Pointdextor and several others.

"I knew it! I knew that Hinata was a troublemaker from the start!" Eustace yelled, shaking his fist.

"Don't look at me. She gets it from YOU'RE side of the family!"Roku snapped.

"She's just trying to help her father." Madam foster said softly.

"But if she is discovered, Iroh will be forever shamed!" Pointexter said quickly and worried, typing calculations on his calculator. " Dishonor will come to the family! Traditional Values will disintegrate!"

"Not to mention they'll lose the farm." Bumi added.

"My children never caused such trouble. They all became healers." Hizahi said pompously.

"Not all of us can be healers." Murial muttered.

"No, your great granddaughter had to be a CROSSDRESSER!" Hizahi yelled. With that the ancestors yelled and bickered, Gramps doing his best to calm them.

"Let a guardian bring her back!" Madam Foster said, motioning to the statues above them. The ancestors ceased their bickering and began shouting voices of approval.

"Yes! Awaken the most cunning!" Roku grabbed Dojo and shoved him in front of a statue.

"No! Send the swiftest!" Bumi said, grabbing Dojo from Roku and shoved him in front of a stone rabbit.

"No the wisest!" Murial pointed to a monkey statue.

"ENOUGH!" Luon yelled, silencing them. "We must send the most powerful of all!" He declared, motioning outside to the great stone dragon that was outside the temple. There was a sly snicker from the temple ceiling, all the ancestors looked up to see Dojo, sitting smugly on the empty pedestal.

"Ho, ho, heh, heh. Okay,okay, I get the drift, I'll go." Dojo said proudly. All of the Ancestors give a quick look of surprise to the little dragon and laughed uncontrollably. Dojo scowled at them. "You all don't think I can do it? Watch this!" Dojo then produced a small, insignificant flame from his mouth. "Ah, ha, Jump back, I'm pretty

incredible huh? Don't make me have to singe anybody to prove a point!"

Eustace grabbed Dojo from the pedestal and held him in his hand. "You had your chance to protect the Hyuga family and blew it!"

"You're misguidance let Papa T 41 to disaster!" Madam foster yelled.

"Yeah, thanks A LOT." Papa T 41's severed head muttered, his body holding it under his arm.

"And your point is?" Dojo demanded.

"Our point is that we're sending a real dragon to retrieve Hinata." Gramps answered.

"But I'M a real dragon!" Dojo pleaded.

"You do not deserve that title!" Gramps snapped, grabbing the little dragon. "Now go wake the great stone dragon!" He thundered, tossing him out of the temple and near the stone dragon.

"So you'll get back to me on the job thing?" he yelled. His answer was in the form of his gong being thrown at him. "Man is one chance too much to ask?" He muttered as he dragged his gong. "Come on big guy wake up!" Dojo yelled, banging his gong around the stone dragon. Oddly enough the dragon did not wake. "Come on buddy you gotta fetch Hinata!" Again, the dragon did not stir. Dojo became angry and climbed up the dragon and banged the gone by it's pointed ear. "HEY! WAKE UP!" unfortunately he had banged too hard and the dragon's ear fell off. Dojo squeaked and held the stone ear. "Stone Dragon?" The statue immediately fell apart, the head still intact sans ear. "Oh no! Oh no! They're gonna kill me!" Dojo whimpered.

"Great Stone Dragon! Have you awaken?" Luon called from the temple window.

Dojo thought quick and pushed the head up, the tall grass hiding the small dragon and only showing the head. "Uhhh, Yes, I just woke up! And I

am the Great Stone Dragon, good morning! I will go forth and

fetch Hinata. … Did, did I mention that I was the Great Stone Dragon?"

"Be quick, the fate of the Hyuga family rests in your claws." Gramps finished.

"Don't even worry about it, I will not lose face!" The weight of the head finally gave in and Dojo toppled near the gate, the stone head falling right on top of him. "Ow…." Dojo muttered as he squeezed out. "That's just great. Now what? I'm doomed! And all 'cause miss man decides to take her little drag show on the road.

Navi, who had witnessed everything, flew up to him. "Why don't YOU go after her?"

"Me? HA! The only way that'd work is if I brought her home with a medal." Dojo said. But immediately a light bulb popped on in his head. "That's it! If I make her a war hero, they'll BEG me to be a guardian again! Oh yeah the master plan baby! I've done it now!" He said as he slithered out the gates. Navi followed behind.

"Hey wait up!" Navi called. "I wanna go too!"

"Heh and why should I bring you?" Dojo asked.

"I'm lucky."

"OH! So you're lucky huh? Okay…. Do I look like a sucker to you?!?" He snapped.

"No, you're more like a loser." She muttered.

"why you-" He muttered. As he said this Stitch scurried up and sniffed Dojo all over. "Hey watch it fido! I have important business! I got to bring Hinata back!"

"I want to go! Hinata my friend!" Stitch said in his warbled English.

"Alright Cujo but don't hold us back-woah!" Stitch grabbed Dojo and Navi and placed them on his back and scurried off in the direction Hinata went. "Now this is more like it! Look out Toonia here we come!" Dojo laughed as the trio left the Hyuga grounds, following the trail toward the missing girl……

End of Chapter

Phantom64: what did you think? Things will get even funnier next chapter!

Dojo: Read and Review!


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